You sensed something different in your spouse after their return from a trip. They were distant and kept that way for the next few weeks. In the past six months, your marriage went through some extreme challenges – a major health scare and a job loss. The two of you could not seem to overcome this.
Things seem empty now. The support and comfort have eroded, replaced by abandonment and discomfort. Although you had enrolled in marriage counseling, the tenets you learned from your therapist did not seem to stick. Regardless, this is shocking news that you and your spouse will separate. However, the signs were there.
Unhappiness, avoidance, behavioral changes
For every couple, the potential signs of divorce are different. However, some of those signs appear more than others. Among them include:
- General unhappiness: You feel unhappy not just when you are with your spouse, but when you are doing everyday life activities.
- Avoidance: The two of you avoid each other, sometimes, even turning your back on the other during discussions.
- Family and friends recommend that you end the marriage: These people know you well. Maybe they notice the spark has left you and sense your unhappiness.
- Excessive criticism: Even the most minor mistake may trigger bouts of almost never-ending criticism from your spouse. Negative interactions are not good.
- The end of physical intimacy: Hugs and kisses even make you uncomfortable, so they, too, are avoided.
- Discussions regarding long-term plans disappear: Your goals are different now. No talks about future plans together such as planned vacations, major home remodels and focusing on retirement savings goals.
- Significant changes in priorities and values: Your marriage has diverged down two paths. The values and priorities you once shared have gone away.
- Changes in behavior: Maybe your spouse has purchased a new wardrobe, lost significant weight and spends more nights outside the home with “friends.” These are potential signs of an extra-marital affair.
You invested several years in your marriage. However, your partnership has unraveled. The signs of your troubled marriage gradually surfaced and now it is likely time to go your separate ways.