The divorce gauge often spins out of control when two spouses choose to attack and ambush each other when they separate. This is high-conflict divorce – often at its worst — when estranged couples choose to punish each other to gain an upper hand.
But no one wins in high-conflict divorce. Someone within a failing marriage must attempt to take the high road but also must concentrate on self-preservation. You cannot be a fool, knowing the antics subscribed to by a vengeful spouse.
Boundaries and well-being
Here are some crucial factors that require focus when in the midst of a high-conflict divorce:
- Creating effective boundaries remains a priority: By establishing boundaries, separating couples may be able to create reasonable routines and more civil conversations. Those boundaries may address a spouse’s actions, words and behavior.
- Expressing the consequences if a spouse ignores those boundaries: These boundaries may be physical, emotional, financial and relate to contact/communication. Clearly inform your spouse what will happen when he or she ignores any such boundary.
- Following through when spouse crosses those boundaries: Firmly understand that you cannot control the behavior of your estranged spouse. Consequences may include implementing a no-contact order through court intervention.
- Focusing on yourself: Your well-being must remain a priority. Stand up for yourself. You were part of this marriage and deserve respectful treatment. Be firm and do not let your spouse bully you.
High-conflict divorce represents an obstacle that you can overcome. Focusing on the right mindset and strategy can help, and so can guidance from a legal ally.
A powerful ally
The above factors may help you cope with a high-conflict divorce. Enlisting the help of a skilled family law attorney works in your favor. An attorney is a powerful ally.